Cancer log, stardate: February 27, 2014.  I saw the surgeon today.  In fact, four very important things happened today.  (Think about that - some days just sail by, spent in agony or ecstasy, alone or in a crowd, home or traveling, at work or play... etc, etc.   But how many of those days - eventful as they might be - become truly memorable.  Today was memorable for those four important things.)

Here's what happened, in order of significance:

1. I found out that one of my students got into rehab - and that they are doing great!!!  That is the best news I have had in a long time!  I admit I shed a few tears worrying about this one, but it appears that they are on the road to recovery.  I am so relieved.


2.  One of my reluctant learners called me tonight to let me know he was modifying an assignment I gave him.  Mind?  Heck, I'm glad you're doing it!  I'm glad you're calling me!  I'm glad that I could hear the excitement in your voice.  Sure, the project is building an airplane out of soda cans, but at least you're doing it!  I can't wait to see the final result tomorrow.  Oh, and calling me back a second time to double check your appointment time?  Very nice.  See, what you don't know is I've been thinking about you quite a bit lately. About the fact that you're a smarty pants (gosh, I wanted to use a different term there!), and that you like to come around and hang out at school, but not produce work.  I think you're a smart young man (with a killer handshake grip), but you will not get through 9th grade next year if you repeat your 8th grade performance. So, let's get this show on the road - tell me, how can I help you?  I'm hoping this hands-on assignment is the beginning of better times...

[An aside:  I suppose that all occupations think, "Nobody understands me but a fellow ___ insert occupation here ___ ."  I've heard this speech before and - as it concerns your professional life - it may be true.  But teachers or ___ insert occupation here ____ are not the only ones who have a hard time turning their brains off after they clock out.  At any rate, one of the things that keeps teachers up at night is trying to figure out how to reach that one student.  There is always at least that one student who we can't seem to reach... How can I get that one student to do work?  How do I get that one student to become an independent thinker?  How do I get that one student to learn?????  Like anything else, sometimes it just takes time.  And consistency.  And patience.  And persistence.  And a small miracle... ]


3.  A kind word from a well-placed source landed upon my ear.  On most other days this year, this would have merited the number one mention.  Seriously.  I'll explain in a second.  BRB.  Okay.  I'm back.

The top of the food chain at my school is a smart, creative, visionary man, who has built our charter school from one site three years ago to five sites and growing.  He is passionate about giving students a quality, individualized education.  Thankfully so, because this school serves a very important population, and has helped many of these young men and women on the road to self-reliance.  Because he is so involved in growing the school and all the work that goes with it, I work directly with and for the person in charge of my particular site, and rarely do I see the big kahuna.  Anyway... somehow I got it into my head that he doesn't like me.  (It may have been because I called him a grandfather in public one day - long story.)  But no, the genesis of this irrational fear predates that faux pas. Who knows why illusions and doubt seem to find such easy residence in my cranium?

For months, my peers, friends, family, acquaintances, students, the woman at the laundromat, etc. have talked about next year at school...  I have assiduously avoided being taken in by their insistence, assurances, and affirmations.  Until today.  Until today, I only hoped that I'd get invited back to teach next year.

So?  What happened today!??!

Today, we had a conversation that went like this:

Him: Hey, Ken - next year, would you like to do the BTSA program?

Me: (Hopefully only my inside voice:  NEXT YEAR?  NEXT YEAR!  NEXT FREAKING YEAR!??!  I'M COMING BACK NEXT YEAR????)

Me: (Aloud) I'd love to.

Me: (Inside again  - BTSA!  I get to mentor new teachers!??!  Heck, ya!  I relish the role of Old Pro/Elder Statesman/Sounding Board/Uncle).

Me: (HOPEFULLY inside my head - Ran around the school yelling, "She thinks I'm cuuuuude..." [Gratuitous Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer reference...]

Him: Cool.

Good stuff for this old pessimist.  I always think I can do a better job - help more kids - get my paperwork done on time - come up with more creative assignments/lessons, etc.  Self-doubt and I are never far apart.

All kidding aside, though, I am psyched to hear this news.  This will help lower my blood pressure - which, by the way, was 118/77 today at the surgeon's office.  Oh, yeah.  Now, I can plan for some continuity. Although, I won't be able to ride to NY this summer because...


4.  I met my Urologist/Surgeon today.  It's already late and I could never do the entire appointment/discussion/prognosis/treatment choices/side effects/schedule, etc. justice in the time I have remaining.

Sorry about that.  If you turned in to read about cancer, here you go:  CANCER SUCKS.  (We will certainly expound upon this theme tomorrow, I assure you...)

That is all.

Thank you, one and all for reading.  I can't express how much it means to me.

Carpe Diem.