Frequently, when I'm teaching or just in conversation with someone, I mutter those immortal words, "Where was I?"

Sooooo...  Where was I?

While riding, I have started to compile a list of rules (okay, guidelines) to assure - or at least improve the chances of - a good day riding.  Here are the eight I've come up with so far:

1.  Keep the pen with the journal (seems obvious, I know, but it's hard to take notes in the journal without a writing implement)
2.  Shower when you have the opportunity (I don't which nights I'll be camping, etc. so when you're in the hotel, shower at night, shower in the morning, sailors take warning - wait! hat's a different axiom)
3.  Be flexible
4.  Be open
5.  Be yourself
6.  Don't fixate on destination!!!!   I have violated myself on this rule many times on this trip so far...  It kind of looks like this (insert weird flashback music and swirling visual effect here):  You wake up in the morning - this is usually a good start - and look at a map (Wait - take a shower first!).  While looking at the map, you decide, gee, insert town name here looks like a cool place to spend the night.  Hmm, it's only 280 miles away.  That's doable.  The day then unfolds like this:  Get bike ready.  Get food.  Wait for temperature to rise above 50 degrees.  Get on the road.  See something cool.  Stop and take photos.  Pull over to write in journal, take a pee, a mental health break, grab a drink of water, get gas, stretch, read map, etc.  See something cool.  Go down dirt road, ride through waterfall, shoot and upload videos, check in on Facebook.  Hmmm...  What is absent in all this - oh, yeah - RIDING!  After all the distractions and singing and writing and photographing, etc. I've gone 61.4 miles and it's 1PM.  Uh oh, insert town name here is still 220 miles away and now I've got to bust my ass to get there by a reasonable time.  BTW, reasonable time varies by season, temperature, direction of travel, etc.  I'm currently riding westerly directly into a setting sun, and the fall has proven to be very brisk since the jet stream decided to get lazy and sag down over the whole of the central US.  That makes reasonable time somewhere close to 6:17:42PM (that's approximate, of course).  So, what does the afternoon ride look like?  Hanging on for dear life and pounding the throttle, driving past cool stuff and creative photo ops.  And the whole time the little voice inside my head is saying, go back, that would be a cool photo, detour, etc.

Whew... I typed that all in one breath (not!)  Now, let's relax, take a deep breath, and look at a trip the way it should be conducted (insert obnoxiously upbeat soundtrack here replete with annoying voiceover):

Get up, take a shower, grab food, look at map, decide on general direction of travel for the day, including the first few routes, get on bike, go.  Stop as often as necessary.  Repeat.  Find place to crash.  More deep breaths.

7.  Don't pull over for Mental Health Breaks or Map Checks on active dirt roads (I believe I may have addressed this in a previous post, so we will move on without further commercial interruption).

8.  Be specific when memorizing directions.  Internalizing "take Route 9 North, then 9W" is good, but, "take Route 9 North approx. 10 miles, then pick up 9W north of Oxford" is even better.  This way, when my brain has traveled off to faraway places and I've stopped reading road signs (I mean, I see "Bridge may ice before roadway in cold conditions" in my sleep!), I won't have to ask myself, "Self, did you see the intersection for 9W?"  Alright mister, pull it on over, get out that map, berate yourself for zoning out, put away map, lather, rinse, repeat...  No, chances are that I won't entirely miss the city of Oxford, or at least I'm less likely to do that than to miss a road sign.

Those are the rules as they are currently constituted.  They are subject to revision, removal, renovation, and complete disregard.


A health update (physical, not mental):

My surgically repaired left thumb is aching due to cold weather.
My right shoulder throbs with the effects of tendinitis.
I seem to be afflicted with allergies (stuffy nose and a weird rash on my arms, torso, and - spoiler alert! those of you who are 'sensitive' may want to skip this part - my buttocks)
My nose is starting to peel, which would be okay if that meant my nose was actually getting smaller, but I seem to be getting one of those W.C. Fields bulbous numbers instead.
Hair is growing out of my ears (I have no idea what that has to do with anything, other than, perhaps, W.C. Fields).
I need a haircut.