Hi, everyone.  It's a special Late-Night post-statistics class blog entry...  I've had quite a few things on my mind of late - and I really just wanted to write.  I have said this before, but it may bear repeating:  I enjoy sharing these thoughts, ideas, and observations with you.  I truly do.  I knew I probably wouldn't get one in today because of my school schedule (8 to 4 in Yucca Valley, then 6 to 10 in San Bernardino).  I'm home now, in my pajamas and ready for bed.  But I'm going to address one question I get frequently:

Question:  "Aren't you lonely living out in the middle of nowhere?"

Anwer:  "NO!"  "Not really..."  "Sometimes."

These are all answers I've given, as well as just dismissing the question as silly.  But, in the final analysis, I am an extrovert and I love the company of people.  I didn't know that my life would put me here, but I CHOSE TO BE HERE.  So, let's not whine about circumstances or necessity or 'the man' or any other excuses.  I am living here because I choose to live here.  And 90% of the time I love it!  I don't mean 'like it;'  I LOVE IT!

As to loneliness...  Well, I suppose when I am having a down day or a period of depression, I am very lonely.  But I think that the answer would have been exactly the same in Santa Monica, when I lived there for two years, even though I was working three jobs (sometimes four).  What the hell was I thinking, by the way!??!

No, I don't think that alone = loneliness.  I know people who are lonely even though they live with someone.  In fact, I exchanged a few text messages tonight from someone who (I think) belongs in this category.  I even think that the loneliness and desperation of the person who feels 'trapped' is far worse than a solitary person would feel.

Remember, as my friend Thoreau said, "I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately..."  I went to the desert to live my own life.  Not the life that people expect me to lead, or the life that I will have to work a hundred years to afford, or the life that's considered 'normal' (normal is highly overrated, anyway...), or someone else's life - MY LIFE.  It's been a little over a year here at My Little House in the Desert and I have grown by any measure (except my waistline) during my tenure 'in the woods.'

I'm happy about that.

Now, as for this question of loneliness.  At times, I love to embrace the loneliness.  The quiet is incredible.  I am certain I've written of this before.  I like to just sit and listen... to nothing.  It beats car horns and stereos and angry voices and motorcycles (even motorcycles) and the din of the city.  I've always been a country mouse, and living here has reinforced and reminded me of that truth.  Yesterday morning when I was washing the dishes, I noticed 'it.'  I said to myself, "Self, why is it so quiet? Why don't you turn on the stereo while you work?"  And - as I often do - I answered myself, "No... Let's just enjoy the quiet."  And we did.  Well, me and whoever the voice in my head was asking those silly questions.

On the other hand...  (Aren't there always more than one side to any topic?)  I think if I wasn't so 'plugged in' I might be lonely.  Heck, I can get on the internet on my phone, my computer, and my tablet if I want to. I can watch TV on my computer, phone, or - believe it or not - on my TV!  If  I get lonely, I can surf the web, or text, or email, or call someone.  Yes, to be honest, I shouldn't be allowed to say that I am living deliberately and sucking all the marrow from life while I'm so plugged in.  I'm not certain of the clinical definition of addicted, but I fear I'm becoming addicted to Facebook.  I have the app on my stupid phone, and I'm checking it about a zillion times a day.  Why?  I don't know.  Habit?  Partially.  (If that's true, I just need to replace it with a better habit...)  Loneliness?  No, I don't think so; I'm checking it on my phone while sitting at my desk talking to others....  Afraid to miss out on something? Perhaps - that problem is hard-wired in my DNA.  Party?  I want to be there.  Card game?  Deal me in?  Discussion?  Here are my two cents. Road trip?  Let's go!  So, there could be something to this 'addiction,' I suppose.  I just don't know.

And now, I'm "Fading into Bolivia" as a famous person once said.  [BONUS POINTS to the first person who correctly identifies this celebrity.]  I'm off to bed.

Hopefully, these words from Kalina will resound in my slumber:

"Mr. P!  Hands down, one the best people I know!  You have such a good spirit, kind heart, and amazing sense of humor!  You are so genuinely kind and supportive to all your students.  I have never met another teacher like you, Mr. P!  From the beginning of the year when you told me I had a nice smile, you always know how to brighten my day!  Mr. P, wherever next year takes you, you will be successful because you are loved by everyone you meet.  Thanks for everything!"

Thank YOU, Kalina.  It is because of hard-working, intelligent, caring young people like you that I can worry less about the future of this planet.  Be well!

Carpe Diem, one and all.