I know.  I owe you a couple of things...  But first, I want to give you an update on my to-do list so you can see how productive I was today:

• Got gas for car.
• Went to store for sundries (mostly pens and pencils for my students, because mine have gone poof! - another teacher 'thing')
• Went in to the office and prepped Monday students.
• Got ten gallons of water

Now, let's compare this with the to-do list from yesterday:

1. Attend yoga.  I got up this morning and was thinking all about yoga, and what happened? I realized I don't have a yoga mat.  Duh.  Yoga.  Mat.  Yoga. Mat. Golf. Golf clubs.  I see a connection.  Damn stupid rookie.  

So, no yoga.  I did, however, accomplish the entirety of that list above during that two hours or so I would have been at yoga.  So...  But, yeah, no yoga.

2. Finish up grades for students.  Next on the agenda.  And this is a no-brainer - they must be done tonight.  

The good news is that I've still got 2-3 working hours tonight, if I needed them.  Should only take me around 90 minutes, though.  I am about 70% done with the process.

3. Set up router.  This is exactly where the day takes an unpleasant turn.  I followed the instructions on the 'quick start' guide, which - of course - is the only piece of written material in the entire box!  Unless, of course, they stuffed a bunch of adverts in the box, with pithy sayings like, "If you like this ______, you'll love ________!!!!  Or the 'Amazon' approach, "People who purchased this _______, also purchased ______."  And then, of course, we have the king of them all....  Ladies and gentlemen, I present: Ron Popeil... "But wait, there's more!!!!"  Sorry, small rant there...

ANYWAY...  I follow the instructions once, twice, three times.  I try to connect to the network with my phone, but it's like a wraith - there one minute and gone the next...  

After the third attempt, and about 147 seconds after I was looking for a tech-support number, a sign of resignation appeared on my screen:

Please contact customer support at 1-877-OHSHIT7 (Our corporation was shocked that OHSHITS 1-6 were already taken; I mean, c'mon, let's have some originality)  [Editor's note: Under no circumstances were any corporations harmed in the making of  this blog post...  Will the court reporter please note that the commissioner is nodding his head? Thank you.

So, long story short - I know - TOO LATE!  Hey, you've got two choices.  You see, I've used either 5 or 6 of my best lines already.  And in all that excitement, I kinda lost track myself.  So, readers, you've got to ask yourself a question:  Do you want to read it?  Well do ya?  

Okay, momentary out of body experience - Weird, I know...I am so my mother's son; we can both launch a song or a soliloquy on the basis of one exchanged word.  SAFETY WARNING: Do not use the words 'Shrimp' or 'Dam' or 'Amster' or 'Old Woman' around my mother unless you want to be serenaded by an unending escalation of silliness... It is, of course, priceless.  And so is she.  I suppose I am a mama's boy. Not really sure what that is supposed to mean, or why some people would use that as a taunt or put-down...

So, after an exasperating 40 minutes and 32 seconds on the line with tech support, we determine that the router is, in fact, defective.  And now it must return to the store in shame.

I'm reminded here of one of my mantras (this one specific to technology).  I always say, "It should just work."  Ugh. 

WOW - it's suddenly 6 o'clock.  I just had conversations with two dear friends.  The first was about cancer. The second was about, well, I suppose that was about cancer.  I suppose all my phone calls now are about cancer...

IMPORTANT NOTE TO SELF!!!!!  LET ME REPEAT:  IMPORTANT NOTE TO SELF!!!!!

This is why procrastination is never a good plan.  I still need to finish making dinner (juicing tonight), finish grades for students, sort laundry, wash dishes, and I've also got a lot of blogging left to do...

4. Have you detected a pattern here, yet?  Number 4 was sort the laundry.  Not done yet.

5. Clean off kitchen table.  Um, not so much.

6. Do dishes.  Um, no.

7. Blog - Ding Ding!!  Winner Winner... Chicken Dinner!  

8. Get ready for big test tomorrow....  More in this in tonight's installment.

So, now I'm leaving the cozy confines of the typewriter to sully forth in that big, scary land of responsibility.

Catch you later.

Final words tonight come from some of my college students.  These are anonymous, so I'm not sure who gets the attribution:

"Best instructor I've ever had at UOP.  Relatable and easy to learn."

"Best teacher ever. Relaxed, effective, and really happy. I enjoyed his energy."

"He is an outstanding professor.  He knows what he is teaching."

Always good to hear from all constituencies...

Be well.  See you later tonight, I hope!!!